Sunday, August 8, 2010

Running Through the Fire Drills Again

Lately, I've been feeling really incomplete. Really unfinished, as if I have something left to do, which I don't. I've finished my school shopping, my room is clean, my pool job is over for the summer, I'm ready for school to start in two days. It feels like my heart is beating faster than it usually is and like I shouldn't be here typing this, but rather, that I should be organizing my already color-coded closet, or cleaning out the drawers in my room that are currently spotless. These pictures up here probably look fine to everyone else, but I feel like there's still something wrong with them and I keep starting from the original file and editing the same thing on them, even though they end up looking practically the same way they did the previous time. It also feels like my skin tone is one hexcode off from one in a different picture, and I'm trying hard to make that not bother me. I don't get it. I get these little spurts of obsessiveness every now and then, usually before exams, a long trip, or a completely random day of the month. Kind of like a period. But not as disturbing, lengthy, or emotionally abrasive. Which is good, because periods suck. And commas are pretty darn awesome.

I feel stressed out, but there's no reason to be. I feel that I have all this energy inside of me that's ready to be expelled, but in reality, I feel tired to the degree where I'd like to go to sleep at nine pm sharp. I'm sure this feeling will go away once school starts up and gets to be on it's regular schedule once again, but it's seriously obnoxious when you're constantly worrying about making your lamp base square with the nightstand its on, or thinking about how a mosquito bite is on of your legs, but not the other one, and how weird and uneven that feels, and so you take the measure of scratching your other leg and making believe that yes, a mosquito did in fact bite your other leg, and then everything feels nice and even again. That was a long sentence. I never lied when I said I liked extreme comma usage.

That's my ramble now! The next post I make will probably be an outfit I'll be wearing to school, so no short bodycon skirts in a while, haha!

Top: TJ Maxx
Skirt: Forever 21
Heels: TJ Maxx (I've been wearing them all the time now that I rediscovered their awesomeness)
Scarf: thrifted
Bracelet: Claire's


LyddieGal said...

I get really anxious and obsessive sometimes too, never fun. Nor are periods, when I feel like I want to kill someone. Fortunately these feelings usually pass before I have time to forge a murder weapon.

I really like your accessories, and I like how you've photographed them. I too hate it when the colors deviate from image to image, because then you wonder, which one is closer to reality?

I love your honey colored water. That's what I thought it was at first. Tons of Honey.

Have a good first day at school!

Chic on the Cheap

Amber Rose said...

Reading this post, all I could think was "Wow." Because I see so much of myself in you. (Or at least the good parts.) The feeling of an overwhelming compilation of what must be done whereas you've done and redone the tasks and, at the brink of perfection, can never quite quench the thirst for it. Now I'm rambling.. :/

On a less crazed note, these pictures of you are lovely. But you already knew that! :)

Rio said...

Super cute look! Love the skirt! When I wear skirts like that I look like a Kardashian hahaha! :)

Nicole said...

You really look sooo glamorous! I think that little neck scarf is the perfect touch to finish off this look. I feel exactly how you've described sometimes, too. Usually when I've had a really big day or something stressful's coming my way I just get all wound up to the point where I'm so tired I can't sleep. Oh, the irony.

roxanne said...

"Which is good, because periods suck. And commas are pretty darn awesome."

ain't it the truth? pretty much every teacher or professor i've encountered since high school has had to take me aside and tell me to take it down a notch or seven with the commas. they just don't get it.

i would love to feel anxious with nothing substantial behind it. unfortunately, finding a "real" job, moving into a new apartment, and generally keeping my head above water means that when i wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, then i probably actually have forgotten something pretty crucial.. like feeding my cat or something. count your obsessive compulsive blessings, lady.

p.s.: although i am a horrbly sporadic blogger, i am following your blog and loving every post. i should totally stalk more fashion blogggers based on their affinity for michael jackson!

p.p.s.: oh right, fashion. girl, that skirt - you are wearing the hell out of it. love it all.

v [ hobovogue ] said...

the bow's so perfect with that outfit!

hmmmmmm i pay attention to the weirdest things too that bug me... just random things that distract me from what i should be focusing on :( ocd at its finest = me :[ but just try to take joy in the little things you can find that'll cheer you up :)

<33 [v] hobovogue

Charmalade said...

I can't believe you still made a funny despite all the crazybusynervousness that your brain seems to currently be in. You need to breathe and take it easy, girl-- or I'll MAKE you. D: OK, so it's hard to threaten someone if a) I'm relatively far away and b) it's me, come on.
Y'know weird thing is, I totally was all snappy and cranky today, bred out of this feeling of tired restlessness. An oxymoron, I know. It's odd, but making myself up and getting ready to go out helps a bit.

And DAMN that outfit is all business on top and sexy on bottom like a mullet but better. I like the contrast. :D Have fun at school, I wanna hear all about it!

Toast with Charmalade

Under Urooba's Umbrella! said...

This outfit is simply ravishing!
I love the white heels, the muted colours, your hairstyle, even!

And I cannot advise you about your pre-school-starting anxiety--because lord knows I have TONS of that myself. Hee hee.

ash said...

*pat ali*
i'm afraid i can't give you some advice ali, i'm sorry.
but i know it'll pass, i'm sure everything gonna be okay :)

uhh.. i just realize.. you really love black! but it's okay because you look fabulous on it.

wish u all the best!

erin :) said...

Suh-weet photos! But I totally know that uncomplete feeling. The problem is, I've been feeling that way for so long. Ever since I started blogging actually. I've been distracted and I can't finish just one task. I start a bunch of things and I can't finish one. It's kinda stinky and very bad cuz it's college app time. +_+ Anyway, Best of luck with school! I start on the 31st. :)

Erin :)

hannah said...

you look so put together and chic! ready for the first day of school? i love the way you wore that scarf !

Kim said...

Lovely shots, and I adore the little scarf!


Ashley said...

Love this post!

Indie.Tea said...

Haha, I understand the anxious something-left-to-do feeling, I often feel that way myself.
Your outfit is really, really cute!

anton belardo said...

aww sending you some electronic kisses

don't worry things will feel right soon

im excited for your first day at school
hope everything goes well
kisses A.

Isquisofrenia said...

well sometimes we feel like that i think its just how we function.
you remind me of a cute very stylish flight attendant here
and i used to have the same scarf but i think i lost it
i dont know what happen to it
andywyas girl hope your feeling better!

rouli said...

u look so cute in this outfit!Q

lovely blog u have here!

pls come visit and join:))


Keepitrockkinn said...

I'm in love with your heels.

Also: I think a lot of people feel the way that you do sometimes. Myself, I feel that way too much. Often times, the only thing that helps is writing things down. Creative outlets rockk !

yours truly dear said...

whoa your outfit post is way cuter than mine! no fair! jk, it just means you have better style than me, so i'll let it slide this time ;]

v a m p i r e said...

i am awefully bad with words ,

let me just dedicate a song to you :)

♫ Stars - Ageless Beauty

but i surely hope you will feel better by now

Abi said...

Such a sweet little outfit! Love the neck scarf. So darling!

As for the anxiety? Sorry to hear that. I get a little anxious when major deadlines are approaching. Hope you're able to get a hang on it. All the best! x

ASH said...

So good! Love how you tied that polka dotted neck scarf and I adore navy blue and brown together =)


My Republic of Fashion said...

Cute outfit. i love that scarf.:)SarahD

erin :) said...

Oh my gosh. How are you so on top of things? I'm not even close to finishing my apps. I haven't even written my essay. +_+_+_+_+ And you blog pretty much everyday ish! When I blog, it takes up like half of my day so I procrastinate and don't do anything. It kinda stinks - blogging is like a love-hate relationship for me. Anyway, I'm applying to 8ish schools, so I really needa get crackalackin'. I wish I was like you. but really HOW?!?!?! '-' I admire you my friend.

Btw, how do you get so much blog traffic? YOU ARE SO GOOD AT SO MANY THINGS! +_+_+_++_+_+_+_+_+++

sallyannie☆ said...

Oh wow. I cannot say I ever feel like that, my room is...not neat at all. That sounds like it would be terrible though :( Hope you feel better soon!

Re outfit: spots, bow, scarf, yay!

and flowers pick themselves said...

i love that belt! so perfect.

and i'm sending some relaxed + peaceful vibes your way!

xo Alison

Juliet said...

It's my first time on your blog and it's so beautiful! Visit mine in return?

juliet xxx

ellevictoire said...

i love the colors! especially the skirt - it looks great on you :)

Tami said...

I love the skirt so much! You look sooo adorable in it. (= I just made a blog 2 days ago, and i was wondering if you can check it out when you have time. Thanks !

jamie-lee said...

your bowtie is really sweet! I hope that you stop feeling stressed soon x

Rebecca Clairine said...

thx for ur sweet comment ,

cute look! love the tie :D <3
pretty on you.

check my newest post,

Anna-Lena said...

really sexy outfit!great job!

Wynne Prasetyo said...

bodycon skirts are today's must have!

I felt the same thing a while ago but it's been getting better. I feel like something is missing, but I can't find out what as everything looks as perfect as they should be. I decided to focus my thoughts on the things I like and am passionate about and now I feel all better, although the odd feeling is still there. you'll be okay :)

lucy said...

I hope you find some 'ease' in your life...I had been feeling the same way too but found out what it was that was missing I guess :)

Isquisofrenia said...

hahha maybe i dont know could be!

Wynne Prasetyo said...

glad I could help, dear, have a great day :)

Diana said...

lovely look :) i like the necktie !

visit me again soon :)

monica said...

gorgeous! i love the touch of vintage

libys11 said...

aaahh don't get so anxious.. i really hope you're not stressed.. look on the more positive side.. cheer up! :D better things will come your way.. :)

on a lighter note, you look great.. very classy outfit! :D

Animated Confessions

Amy from Forever Curiouser said...

periods suck, awh i loved this post! i'm sure the feeling will pass, it usually does. you look so chic and i really love the belt it ties in the whole look together perfectly x

bubblistyle said...

oh my gosh!i know how that feels because i feel like that too! especially because i'm starting school a few days later as well!
thanks for stopping by my blog! am now following! hope you do the same! :)

Adrianna Traxler said...

Im overly obsessed here..I love this look. It's crazy how a little polka dot scarf can make an outfit POP. Great look I would like to try

Castor Pollux said...

très chic! you look simple yet absolutely outstanding, thumbs up :)

Castor Pollux

Lexy @ Quirky Explosion said...

AW GURL I LOVE THESE PICTURES. For real! They're so sunny and happy. Which is a nice contrast to the FREEZING AND COLD WEATHER RIGHT NOW. (Yeah, I love you, Canada...)

I know what you mean. I definitely go their moments and spurts of "ZOMG WHAT AM I DOING OBSESSIONS." Definitely derives from stress and other un-fun thangzz.

Oh and HOLY MOLY! Your school starts early! :O Hope ya have a happy grade 12 year!

jess said...

I love your scarf.

esercizidistile said...

very nice outfit! love the pois scarf!
hope you are feeling less stressed by now!

Julia said...

You're starting school in only two days?:O Well, good luck:)
Aw, and the outfit is so pretty, love it!

Sabina said...

Lovely blog!
I would like to invite you to mine - I think you will really like it :))
Also, the main reason for my invitation is that I want to invite you to join my Challenge - just click on the link at the very top of my left sidebar and see what it is - I hope you will find it exciting :)
In any case - I hope you enjoy my blog and of course feel free to follow me if you do! ;)

Much love,

Helen said...

i love this outfit, the heels are awesome

Victoria said...

It sounds a bit like your suffering from anxiety attacks, I get them all the time and I always think that there's something more important that I should be doing, so I feel for you chick!

Also I think when you look at pictures over and over again, as all us bloggers do you start to pick on them, well I know I do, I hate all my previous pics now :(

Anyway on a much lighter note I love your outfit it looks very classic.

Hope you're feeling better soon! xxx

Every Little Counts said...

i've been really into scarves lately. love this.