Fossil Floaters

Fossil Floaters, Lithographic print, April 2014

______Huh?

______Is it already time for me to post on teh BLOGE???/

______I wasn't actually ready to post any outfits, so instead my final lithograph from last semester shall be unveiled. I've been busier than my paternal grandmother would be at a male strip club this past week. I imagine that my grandma would rather enjoy those, simply because of her choice in a 21st birthday card she sent me: "Red Rover, Red Rover, send cute, financially stable men right over!" Scrawled fiercely inside the card was a request: "Send the OLD guys to me!"

______She is a wild one and I am forever driven by her electric personality and frankness. In a world of processed orange cheeses, she is spicy and decadent, like well-aged Parmesan with flakes of pepper scattered throughout.



______But yeah, busy week. I had to get my laptop fixed, so I was without it for three days, and those three days were probably the most productive of my summer. I started a 4'x4' painting in the basement, transforming half of my dad's man-cave into a temporary studio, took senior pictures for my neighbor, worked on a good chunk of illustration-comics for my job, and finished two books I had been slogging through. Writing things out makes me feel like I've actually been doing things. Hooray, things!

______Oh! Oh! I'm sure most of you have seen my cake, but since Sunday I have officially been a real 21-year old! I keep forgetting it, too. I'm honestly unfazed by alcohol and still haven't had my first drink, but I'm sure I'll give a darn and sip on some fancy fermented grapes one day.

______Pinkie up.

The Donuts Are Not As They Seem

The Donuts Are Not As They Seem, Lithographic print, March 2014

______More printmaking things! More lithographs! MORE ALCHEMY!

______Witchy terminology aside, here are some more of my pastry-organism pals. The second one is a fairly tiny print, measuring the size of a plush-bunned hamburger or maybe 6x6 inches if you don't want to think about a print in terms of greasy noms.  Even as the semester dwindled to an end, I continued with my initial idea of crafting up an army of these delicate little creatures, even if doing so isn't the most innovative of art things I could have done.

Mother and Child, Lithographic print, April 2014

______So I'm sure some of you have heard this via other social medias, but if not, get this: there was apparently a creepstah out there who made a Facebook profile using my pictures who was pretending to be me, but under a different name. Even more unnerving, there were captions under the pictures acting as if this person had experienced those very moments that I did. A lady contacted me (who found me through google-searching my stolen images since her younger daughters received a request from impostor-me) since she thought the account was extremely suspicious--which it was indeed! I'm so glad that there are people willing to make the world a better place out there. I know that I would do the same.

______Facebook rejected my requests to have the account removed, saying it wasn't an impersonation, which was a very bolonga-filled decision on their part. So bologna-filled that I am now convinced all some of the people behind the Book of Faces drive Oscar Mayer Weiner-mobiles around. I whipped up a strongly worded message to imposter-me and sent something more eloquently written than, but along the lines of, "Bruh, those are my pictures, and you're being absolutely creepy to impersonate me. My smorsgabord of friends have reported for you, so go ahead and delete before you are inevitably smitten."

______He was totally wigged out and deleted. Totally.

______It's a good thing I've got you guys to help me. Thanks so much again for those of you who did take a minute to report him. Girl power... holla!

Donuts Are Like Viewfinders

Donuts Are Like Viewfinders, Lithographic print, 18"x10"

Lithography, Spring (March) 2014

______Here we have my second lithographic print! I'm enjoying formulating personalities for my made-up creatures, these being rather loop-like and possessing some sick hovering abilities. Now we've got sea croissants and land donuts. Next up? A biological pastry critter that holds dominion over the sky. I ain't even playin'.

______I actually had a different image before this one, but it ended up sucking up so much ink when I was preparing it for printing that turned into a ginormous black blob--my professor jokingly named it, "Black Bears in a Black Forest at Midnight." Holding back my manly tears, I sheepishly grained the black blob away from my litho stone and moved on to bigger and better things. Like dancing donut critters.



______Somehow, I flawlessly pulled all six of these prints from the press with finesse. I think the lithography gods felt bad for me and let me print without repercussion this time around. Maybe the inky blob stone was actually some kind of sacrifice needed to print properly. Who knows.

______I posted my success to Facebook, and mi professora saw them and shared them to her wall, thus making my soul happier than a friendly fern in a friendly farm of ferns. That was just as difficult to type as it was to read.

Sea Croissants

Sea Croissants, Lithographic print, 18x24

Lithography, Spring 2014

______Here is my first lithographic print! I began doodling some crescent-shaped worms in my sketchbook and quickly ended up with these delicate critters who are floating and bending in the atmosphere. I plan on working with them again, along with constructing some Sea Bagel buddies to abide them in their journeys. I think I'm going to create a whole family of underwater bakery brethren!

______I have really grand news about this: my printmaking teacher shined a bright light on my dull day by telling me she submitted it to a showing at the PaperWorks Gallery in Birmingham. She used her people skills to ensure that mine had a place in the show since I was diligent in and outside of class, whereas the rest of my class has been pretty laid-back and slow to start. She also said she'd gladly help me through an independent study in Lithography next Fall semester. That was a big honor since she usually tells people to go away when they want to do one. That means I would be able to make the independent study work around my own schedule opposed to attending to class at specific times. She straight up blurted out how my entire class was basically holding me back, but then said if I mentioned what she just said to anyone in the class that she would fiercely deny it.

______In my book o' life, there is really no larger compliment than one from a teacher, and I must say I feel as fuzzy as the fluffy cilia of my sea croissants.



______Some of you asked what Lithography is. It's a form of printmaking, but it's much more intensive than, say, woodblock or linocut printing where you carve into a block, slather it in ink, lay paper on top of it, and roll it through the press. It's based on the concept that oil and water repel each other... and that's all I'm going to say because describing the process would one) give you a case of the ultra yawns, and two) make you stare at me with wide eyes like I'm some kinda breakdancing rooster.

______But in a nutshell? It's sort of like ghosts. Lithography is totally just ghosts n' magic. And nitric acid, solvents and grease, and inky hands that whimsically perform all sorts of scientific wonders. It makes you smell like a hazardous auto shop and look like you've been attacked by tiny scooter wheels, but most importantly, it gives you a sense of pride when you're all done with it.

______Le end. Enjoy le sea croissants. But no eating them, for they are friends.