Monday, June 8, 2015

I-I-I-I'm Stayin' Alive


______I promise you all I haven't fallen off the face of the earth like a gob of queso falls from a tortilla chip, just as I promise I haven't been taken hostage by a vicious band of time traveling bards. I have merely remained hidden these past few months. Unbeknownst to you, I've been observing everything from behind a very suspicious looking bush. I waddle around on concrete shaking my plastic leaves obnoxiously so everybody knows I'm not a real bush rooted to the earth, but I still inhabit the bush because pretending to be a bush makes you laugh at yourself for hours.

______And you guys know how I love poking fun at myself; that way, you guys can't do it. Because I know you would. BIG JERKS. I bet you all flick ladybugs for fun.

______Besides, if I was taken hostage by time traveling bards, I'd probably join them in their fifteenth century shenanegins. I've always wanted to sharpen my lute skills, become infected with the incurable plague, and be discriminated against since I'm a woman. At heart, I always knew I was a peasant wench.


______My final semester as an undergraduate was the busiest of all with 18 hours of classes and a part-time illustration job. It was a persevering trial where I was included in three shows (one which was an exhibition in a space an undergraduate has never shown before), received a handsome $15,000 fellowship that will allow me to pursue my textile-based art for another year or so (holy potbelly pigs on a plane, batman!), tried to understand my own art and practice through the longest artist statement I've ever written, exchanged names with a range of vibrant people, and performed all those other daily mundane tasks that sap precious minutes away, like exercising and remembering to eat.

such peptomilk

______I'm in no way complaining because being busy is my jam and biscuits, yo.

______It was a nice, productive sort of drowning… like drowning in chocolate milk, and everything around you is so tasty you can't complain. And sometimes opportunistic marshmallows float by and other times obstacles present themselves, like wasps that are still alive are veering toward you on their backs, barely a threat but still terrifying and always looming. And your professors are wearing floaties or lounging on inner tubes and pull you up when your arms need a rest and you need a pep talk, but soon after you willingly dump yourself back in to the chocolate milk. You know you've gotta swim hard since they're always watching.

______Always watching. They could be in a plastic bush watching you slurp down that tea in the art quad. Shake shake. What's that? Oh shit, it's your professor wearing a bush! GET BACK TO WORK, PEASANT STUDENT.

______And then, just like that, graduation smacks you in the face like a drunk guy's sweaty manboob in a mosh pit. And now I've finally begun working on art with the money I've received from the Windgate Fellowship. Basically with that, I was given 15k to better my textile craft-based work, which I've put aside for delicious pricy fabrics and embellishments, two sewing workshops, and renting a studio space.

______So... that's where I've been. I'll be back and frequent as ever on here! Thanks for sticking with me, you guys. You're cooler than cool. You're ice cold. Aw-right-aw-right-aw-right-aw-right.

______Here's to the next year! (I say as I clink my apple juice-filled wine glass to my laptop screen)


LyddieGal said...

Sounds like things are going very well, and I'm glad to hear that you are busy and happy and fully pursuing your artistic dreams. Always looking forward to what you create next!
Chic on the Cheap

Jo said...

Hello Ali, I haven't realised that you have been on a blog hiatus for a few months. Makes me so glad that I still get to see your funny postings on FB and more recently updates on Instagram. You are such a nerd even with these sensual/arty pictures! Pretending to be a bush? Lol... It's good to be busy but do take a break now and then. Oh yeah, maybe you could continue with cycling and meet some funny men.

Jo's Jumbled Jardinière

Linda B said...

Dude, I find it incredible you still manage to keep up with blogging and stalking us in bush form! :b
Congrats on that amazing fellowship by the way, you completely deserve it and I've enjoyed seeing your work and progress (especially through the candid ways like Snapchat and what not haha :D)
These milky photos are STUNNING and so artsy. Love love love <3
Stay awesome Ali, and look out while paddling through the chocolate milk of life.
PS: your analogies are BAE

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The Dragonfruit Diaries

Keit said...

Giiiiiiirrl, you're on fire! Whooo, with that amount of money, imagine how many video games you can get!!! Or, you know, spend them for realizing your dream or whatever....:D I am so happy to hear you are well and taking your own artsy path! You kick ass!
Also, are you just saying you are back and then you're going to leave again for months and then write that you've been busy living the dream and promise you would be back again and so on, because if that's the case, I am oficially not talking to you!
And oh my, I almost see boobiez in these photos!

Kristian said...

Wow- sounds like you got big plans for the next year. Congrats on the fellowship :)

Lily Fang said...

Aliiiiiiiii!! I'm so, so happy that you're back. I missed your witty writing and artsy posts, but I knew you were out there killing it in the art world. I'm beyond proud of you for nailing that fellowship and know you'll make the most of it. Huge congrats on graduating, and best of luck with those textile pursuits!

The photos in this post are also so thought-provoking. I like the color in them and how they're not obvious and so intriguing.

Much love always!

imperfect idealist