Thursday, January 7, 2010

Severe Snowflake Warning





Today was very dramatic, for I survived a terrible snowstorm. I was outside with my dog, throwing him a tennis ball back and forth, just as I would any other day. When he came back, I realized that a foreign white substance was inhabiting his head. It was flaky and looked utterly painful. What could it be? Dandruff? Cotton? I was unsure. I warily reached out to touch them, and to my astonishment, noticed that the same white things were on my sleeves as well, attached like little leeches! I looked up and saw the white things falling from the sky, and gasped wholly. They were consuming me whole, swallowing my body, choking it in a chilling and terrifying death wish! I could not speak, my mind was going faint. I was in such shock that I nearly died of hypothermia, but thankfully my mother saw me and braved the white things, which I later learned are referred to as "snowflakes" in most places, and she dragged me a long and dreadful three feet into the safe haven that was the garage. I would not be here today if it wasn't for the valiant soul that is my mother. I am Ali, and this is my survival story of the January 2010 Alabama snow flurries.

Such terror, I know! Our school was closed today as a result of these demonic snowflake things. Snow flurries occurred around 12:00pm, nothing big; they lasted about fifteen minutes at most. The "snow" that we received didn't even stick, at that. It turned into water right when it hit the ground. I drove to Publix to buy chocolate chips to make cookies, and the flakes melted on my windshield. The windshield wipers would go off about every five minutes maybe. At Publix, people were running around in marshmallow ski jackets. My brother went to deposit a check and the banks were closed due to "severe weather conditions." By then, it was sprinkling very lightly, just barely, and a little colder by then. . Is that severe? We've gone to school during tornado and hurricane warnings, but why we didn't go today is beyond my knowing!

Ah, well. Just another thing I love about living in the South. "Dear goodness, a whole intact snowflake! Hurry, close the schools before we all slip in a half-frozen puddle and die!" I actually wish I could have gone to school today, sigh. Now tomorrow teachers are going to be pushing it extra hard, and to think, we just got back from the break! I wouldn't have minded if we actually had enough snow to build a snowman, like last year's, but this was just silly.



About the picture: I roamed around to see if I could take a picture of any of the barely frost covered things, but nothing perked my interest, so my dog's ragged leash had its picture taken instead. I rather like how the leash part is more defined than the clasp-- it makes for an unexpected focal point.

1 comment:

Jen said...

thanks for the comment! and i love this entry, it made me laugh. best survival story i've read in quite a long time, haha :)